My friend's Gruul's speech

My friend Mike runs a hordie guild on another server and has perfected his Gruul's "pre-game" speech. He said overgeared people still come to the runs just to hear it. He even wrote it down. I found it hilarious so I thought I'd share it.

Quote :

Alright everyone take a knee. Come on. /kneel Now, this is it team. Final game. I know you all have been working all season to get here. Frankly I'm amazed you pulled it off. I mean really, this pack seemed like they couldn't work their way out of a wet paper bag never the less actually win! Here we are though! Now, here's the plan. I know this guy is big. Huge. Monsterious even. Frankly I expect him to murder you all and use your corpses as hand puppets when he's done. I believe he has a weakness. I have inside information that his left middle toe is infected. I want to exploit that.

I want you rogues to take those so called weapons of yours and go jab him merciously in that toe. If he happens to step on a couple of you all the better. Maybe he'll slip and fall. Might be called a draw but I'm willing to take it. While they are doing that, all you wussy casters and hunters who don't have the gall to actually get in there and DO anything... You need to be way back hitting him with whatever you losers call attacks. If he charges after any of you, I want to see you throw yourself down his throat. If enough of you get in there he'll likely choke.

Healers, do your fancy little light shows and try not to cause any trouble this time. Ok team! Lets do this! Let us pray... Oh great Earthmother, please bless these fools with some sort of grace, skill, or plain luck to see them through this final game. And when they die, please watch after their useless empty souls. I know they're a royal pain in the ass, but they mean well in their pathetic little ways. Ok good talk! Lets do it! /clap