Blizzard!! Make "insert class here" balanced - QQ

Balance Schmalance

We appreciate feedback.

We really do.

Indeed, we wait with bated breath for your suggestions on how we can make the game better.

Sometimes, it's good.

Except replace the word "sometimes" with the word "rarely".

My particular favorite is the many (many, many, MANY) suggestions we get on how to "balance" the job system.

Do you have any idea how difficult it is to create balance in a system that has 20 entirely different job classes?

They have different abilities.

With different roles.

One might even say they were DIFFERENT JOBS.

Suppose your house was on fire.

No, it's not really on fire. Sit back down.

It's a metaphor, stupid.

So, your house is on fire.

A firefighter shows up.

A police officer.

Maybe a paramedic.

And then a shoe salesman.

Yes.

A shoe salesman.

Now, a shoe salesman might not be as helpful in this type of situation.

BurnVictim>> Someone help me!
BurnVictim>> I'm hurt!
ShoeSalesman>> You know what you need?
ShoeSalesman>> Sneakers.

But he shows up anyway.

And then starts complaining that he's not as helpful as the other people there.

ShoeSalesman>> This is so unfair.
ShoeSalesman>> Damned firefighters with the...
ShoeSalesman>> Saving people...
ShoeSalesman>> From fire...

He starts going on all the fire-fighting related forums.

Post Title: Fire fighting unbalanced

y is it every time there's a fire, everyone invites the firemen? they should totally nerf firefighters.

Then he starts calling up the fire department.

ShoeSalesman>> I have some good ideas on how to balance the fire fighting system.
ShoeSalesman>> They should adjust the strength of the fire.
ShoeSalesman>> Or maybe make the fire weak to... shoes.
FireChief>> Have you lost your mind?
ShoeSalesman>> That totally wouldn't make shoe salesmen overpowered.
ShoeSalesman>> We'd just be a viable job class.
FireChief>> I'm going to hang up now.

There are situations where a shoe salesman would be helpful.

You need a new pair of nikes? Helpful.

You need a nice pair of high heels? Helpful.

You need someone to keep you from burning to death? Not so much.

But the shoe salesman still expects you to completely revamp the entire system to make them more "balanced".

Here is how I might respond to the aforementioned shoe salesman:

GET ANOTHER DAMNED JOB!

If you want to fight fires, BECOME A FIREMAN!

I hate people.

Tomorrow, I'm going to go kick a shoe salesman in the balls.

Hard.

And when he asks for medical help, I'm calling a dry cleaner.

Let's see how he feels about balance then.